Hello my lovely friends !
So tell me...when was the last time you did something for yourself ?
Today I was scrolling through my Instagram feed and got deeply moved by this quote from an unknown source : what if we recharged ourselves as often as we did our phones ? This quote brilliantly illustrates how we too often neglect our own well-being but get a panic attack when our phone battery goes down to 4 %.
It resonated very well with me as I am still recovering from years of people pleasing. I used to feel the compulsion to put other people's needs before mine as I thought it was the key to love an appreciation. Years of constantly seeking validation from other people and ignoring my very own desires left me mentally and physically exhausted.
Self-care is one of the fundamentals of mental and emotional health. As a Nutrition and Lifestyle Coach, I am committed to making it a priority. So I will do everything in my power to brainwash you into believing you are worthy of it :)
But what do I mean by self-care ? Self-care is a series of repeated activities and positive behaviors that lead a balanced life (= happiness). You don't have time ? Well, we all have the same 24 hours in a day ( I promise !) but what you do with it is totally up to you. Setting appropriate boundaries could be a first step towards better self-care. You might want to take some time in the morning to meditate, iron that shirt you like so much, blend that mean green smoothie, rub some lotion on your skin, take your multivitamins. The world is not going to end if you allow yourself some extra time to do you. The opposite might even happen. You can't pour from an empty cup, so looking after yourself is essential to becoming a master at helping others.
If you are a people pleaser ( just like I used to be), don't jump in and say yes to everything but rather take some time to think about it. Learn to offer an honest ''No'' without making up excuses. Saying no because you want to spend time with yourself will only inspire other people to do the same.
If you make it a habit, I promise your life will start changing. You will be more inclined to make healthier choices, you will feel more comfortable to decline an invitation, you will worry less about other people's opinion and you will ultimately attract more respect and appreciation.
We all have heard that it takes 21 days to form a new habit. Well...in a study published in the European Journal of Social Psychology, Phillippa Lally, Health Psychology Researcher at University College London, showed that it actually takes around 66 days. Interestingly, she also found that messing up every now and then doesn’t really affect the process. Good to know !
We sometimes feel pressured by society to minimize our time alone because it can come across as selfishness. So here is my advice : every week, take yourself on a date and get to know yourself. Don't know what to do ? Here a list of fun self date ideas. What I personally like to do as a new citizen of London is to take the bus on weekends and get off at random bus stops to explore the area. I listen to my audio book ( Who says you can't ? You do from Daniel Chidiac ) and get lost in the city. It is usually during these short trips that I'm the most in tune with myself and get drawn to places that bring out wonderful emotions ( like that time I walked into a camping shop because I had spotted a grown up version of Dora the Explorer's backpack ).
I will conclude by saying this : that you are the one and only person in charge of your own well being. Life is not happening to you but FOR you. So if you are not already doing so, make yourself a priority for the next 66 days and share your impressions below !
I wish you the best !
How Long Does It Actually Take to Form a New Habit? (Backed by Science), The Huffington Post, 2014. Available at : https://www.huffingtonpost.com/james-clear/forming-new-habits_b_5104807.html